So. Me. Me...so. Miso. Indeed.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before? Drank legally.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don’t think I made any resolutions, so absolutely, I kept right up with them!
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? No siree.
4. Did anyone close to you die? Nobody close to me, no.
5. What countries did you visit? United States of America!
6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010? A sense of direction. And a job.
7. What date from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? The 31^st because it was just a few days ago. And it was fun.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? My work with Mermaid Avenue.
9. What was your biggest failure? A couple of papers I never did.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Yes. Mono is a bitch.
11. What was the best thing you bought? A trip to Egypt. :D
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? The cast of Mermaid Avenue! :P

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and/or depressed? I don’t want to go into it.

14. Where did most of your money go? Food and bills.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? SO MUCH.

16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2010? Any Lady Gaga song, really. And Dynomite. And Firework. My goodness, what a pyro year.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? About the same.
iii. richer or poorer? About the same amount of poor.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Work.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Procrastinating and eating lol
20. How did you spending Christmas? I went to my Dad’s and then came home and then went and saw a movie with my Mom
21. What have you learned about yourself in 2010? I’m capable of doing more than I thought I was. I can take myself a bit more seriously.
22. Did you fall in love in 2010? Yes
23. How many one-night stands? None lol
24. What was your favorite TV program? Ooh uh…Glee is awesome.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? No hate.
26. What was the best book you read? Oh goodness, I haven’t read much. One of the Maximum Ride books! :P

27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Online radio thingitts lol
28. What did you want and get? Through the year
29. What did you want and not get? A huge amount of money and an easy break for those I love
30. What was your favorite film of this year? Tooooo maaaaaany
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I hung out with my family at Deep Creek Lake. Turned 21.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? MORE MONEY.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010? “This doesn’t fit so well. Now it fits a lot better. Now it doesn’t fit so well, again.”
34. What kept you sane? Patience. Laughter. Love.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Oooh fancy? Lol gonna have to go with Darren Criss. Ohmagoodness. LOL

36. What political issue stirred you the most? The DREAM Act.
37. Who did you miss? A good number of people, here and there.
38. Who was the best new person you met? Dunno
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010: Things go right for a reason; because people make it happen.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine, Just own the night like the 4th of July
PLACES:
1) PLACE YOU HUNG OUT THE MOST IN THIS YEAR: Rosenstock and my couch
2) FAVORITE NEW PLACE YOU DISCOVERED: Regretsy.com
3) PLACES YOU WENT ON DATES: Lol uhmmm the movie theater and the park and restaurants.
4) FAVORITE VACATION SPOT FOR THE YEAR: Hood campus quad.  
5) PLACES YOU MADE OUT IN (OR MORE) THIS YEAR: A lady doesn’t kiss and tell. Much.

PEOPLE:

1) PERSON WHO TAUGHT YOU ALOT THIS YEAR: Marianne, Chris, Quinn
2) AN OLD FRIEND YOU REDISCOVERED THIS YEAR: Shannon : )
3) PERSON WHO TOLD YOU THE NICEST THING ABOUT YOURSELF: Several lovely people.
4) PERSON WHO DID SOMETHING REALLY GREAT FOR YOU (AND WHAT): My Granddad and Dad, sending me to Egypt in January.
5) PERSON YOU SPENT THE MOST TIME WITH THIS YEAR: Myself.
6) PERSON YOU DID SOMETHING REALLY GREAT FOR (AND WHAT): Oh goodness, I don’t know!
7) SOMEONE YOU WISHED YOU TALKED TO THIS YEAR: I talked with everybody I wanted to lol
8) SOMEONE WHOM YOU STARTED A GREAT NEW FRIENDSHIP WITH THIS YEAR: Hmm perhaps Hilary
9) OLD ENEMY/S YOU MADE PEACE WITH THIS YEAR: Don’t have any
10) SOMEONE YOU LOST THIS YEAR: I haven’t lost anyone, remember?
11) PERSON/S YOU KISSED THIS YEAR: Just two
12) PERSON WHO MADE YOU LAUGH THE MOST: Cannot choose!
13) PERSON WHO MADE YOU CRY: I couldn’t choose just one : P
14) PERSON YOU USED TO LIKE, THEN DISLIKED WHEN THE YEAR BEGAN BUT ENDED UP BECOMING GOOD FRIENDS WITH: What the hell kind of flake do you take me for?
15) PERSON YOU CRUSHED ON THE ENTIRE YEAR: Nope
16) SOMEONE YOU WISHED YOU APOLOGIZED TO: I’m good
17) PEOPLE YOU WENT OUT ON DATES WITH: Ones I dated
18) FRIENDS YOU WENT OUT WITH ALOT: I didn’t go out all that often lol
19) COOLEST PERSON YOU MET THIS YEAR: The Queen of England. She’s amazing.

STUFF:
1) CLOTHING ITEM YOU WORE THE MOST THIS YEAR: JEANS.

2) NICEST PRESENT YOU GOT THIS YEAR: A trip to Egypt!
3) FAVORITE SONG FOR THE YEAR: Dunno!
4) COOLEST EVENT OF THE YEAR: My goodness…QUIDDITCH WORLD CUP! :D
5) NEW HOBBY YOU PICKED UP THIS YEAR: Losing weight haha not really new, but eh
6) BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR: Oh goodness, I don’t know. THE BIBLE. Can’t lose with that. XD
7) BEST MOVIE: again
8) MOST SHOCKING NEWS HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Nothing comes to mind…
9) FAVORITE FOOD FOR THE YEAR: Tiramisu.
10) FAVORITE NEW ARTIST THAT CAME OUT THIS YEAR. Probably Bruno Mars, although he didn’t really just come out


LESSONS:
1) WISEST THING YOU DID THIS YEAR: Lol
2) STUPIDEST THING YOU DID THIS YEAR: Reverted
3) BIGGEST CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE THIS YEAR: This past summer, a lot of things
4) BIGGEST CHALLENGE OF THE YEAR: Juggling EVERYTHING
5) SOMETHING YOU LEARNED THE HARD WAY: I can’t make everyone happy all of the time
6) GREATEST LESSON YOU LEARNED THIS YEAR ABOUT LIFE: …and that’s completely okay.
7) BEST JOKE YOU'VE HEARD ALL YEAR: Oooh not sure!
8) BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT OF THE YEAR: Myself, I suppose
9) BIGGEST BLESSING OF THE YEAR: My friends and family
10) BIGGEST THING YOU DISCOVERED ABOUT THE WORLD: It’s never going to truly change.
11) BIGGEST THING YOU DISCOVERED ABOUT PEOPLE IN GENERAL: Not much.

1. Will you be looking for a new job? Oh yes.
2. Will you be looking for a new relationship? Nope
3. New house? No siree
4. What will you do different in 2011? What I need to do differently.
5. New Years resolution? Make it happen.
6. What will you not be doing in 2011? Going back to Hood in the Spring.
7. Any trips planned? EGYPT! Perhaps Jamaica. Maybe HarryPotterWorld. New Jersey. :D
8..Wedding plans? Not that I know of.
9. Major thing on your calendar? Leaving on Thursday for Egypt.
10. What can't you wait for? Everything.
11. What would you like to see happen differently? Every moment.
12. What about yourself will you be changing? My appearance, for the better. My work ethic, for the better.
13. What happened in 10 that you didn't think would ever happen? Something I thought would NEVER happen? Gosh I don’t know. I lived until the end of the year. Pretty amazing.
14. Will you be nicer to the people you care about? Sure!
15. Will you dress differently this year than you did in 2010? I’ll try and dress nicer.
16. Will you start or quit drinking? I’m not an alcoholic
17. Will you better your relationship with your family? Sure!
18. Will you do charity work? I’d sure like to.
19. Will you go to bars? Sure.
20. Will you be nice to people you don't know? I try to be, already. So, yes, I will continue that.
21. Do you expect 2011 to be a good year for you? By George, I do! Yes.
22. How much did you change from this time last year till now? I’m not sure.
23. Do you plan on having a child? Oh my goodness, no. That’s not in the cards for 2011.
24. Will you still be friends with the same people you are friends with now? I’d like to be.
25. Major lifestyle changes? Yes
26. Will you be moving? Back home from school for the last time.
27. What will you make sure doesn't happen in 11 that happened in 10? The not knowing.
29. There's no 28....Will you have someone to kiss at midnight? I didn’t, nope. And it was just fine.
30. One wish for 11? For all of us to be our best selves.

Why in the world am I watching the Food Network?
Gotta hand it to these people, they make icing a cake look like an Olympic sport.  Which makes sense, since some Olympic sports are about as fun to watch as someone icing a cake.
Don't get me wrong, though, I love watching the Olympics and can't wait to watch the ones which are coming up. Oh, you poor, poor Winter Olympics. Next to the Summer Olympics you'll always be the Jan to their Marsha.  I liked Jan, though. She wasn't as self-obsessed as her older sister and I highly doubt she slept with Peter. Sometimes I think my synapses operate on cable. Changing the channel, now. In my mind, I mean. I've gotta see who wins Chopped, even though I don't care about this show. At all. It's really the only reality cooking show I've watched which hasn't interested me much, which is maybe why I'm giving it another chance. Could it really be this boring? Really??
Anywho, it's gotten to the point lately where I'm noticing reality show crossovers. Contestants from various reality shows are appearing on different reality shows years later and I recognize and remember them. So...why can't I remember to do the laundry, some days? HA.
You know what I enjoy? Philosophical conversations. I can't say why, however. They're utterly fruitless most times. Two people discuss and discuss and discuss and then in the end, there really is no end, and nothing has really been discussed at all. Anything and everything can be dissected and beaten down or overemphasized or minimized--DUDE. I've seen this Chef on TV, before. Really? REALLY?? Peter Giannakis, it says. I have to check this. Maybe I'm crazy. But he has a very destinctive smile. Can't find anything. Oh well, doesn't matter. No, it does, I'm not crazy, he's been on something else. Moving on...
Back to philosophy, there you have it. I really don't feel qualified to talk about much anything, ever. Why should I? I'm just me, and I just know what I know, and who's to say I even know what I think I do? All I have under my belt are my experiences over the past 20 years, others' experiences which I've witnessed, and every episode of every TV show and movie I've ever watched, and every book and every magazine or newspaper article I've ever read. And there's so much more to learn and so much I'll never know. I want to help my loved ones more than I do, and then when there's nothing left for me to do for them, I feel helpless. Which makes sense. I still don't know what I want to do with my life but I want to make sure it's SOMETHING. For the most part I have a wonderful family and a wonderful boyfriend and wonderful friends. I want to make them proud, ya know? : )
Saddest thing about Iron Chef America is that they don't have the silly English voiceovers that the Japanese version needed to take on for the American viewing audience. I used to love when they'd get to the one tiny little Japanese girl on the judge panel and she'd giggle something simliar to, "Teeheehee oh my, oh my, I simply love [clams/chicken/beets/worms/insert any other secret ingredient here]! Teeheehee I think they are just wonderful! This is wonderful! Yum! Teeeheehee, yummy!" Too funny.
Anyway, this isn't going anywhere. But hopefully I am lol.

Here's the thing. I'm going to post something about this because my journal is ALL the way upstairs, and there are a number of reasons I'm not going to get it, reasons of which include (but are in no means limited to) the fact that frankly I'm too lazy to go get it, I can type faster than I write, and the fact that I haven't posted written in my real journal since FEBRUARY of this year. All right. I'm a Christian. I can't really say WHY I am, it's just what I believe in. All right, why do I believe in it? I was raised to think that an omnipresent being rules over the universe. That sounds good to me. This guy/gal/being-beyond-our-feeble-minds’-imagining made the Earth in “seven days." Hmm. Now, we know that the Earth wasn’t made in seven days, for some sort of Stephen Hawking reason. However, I really find it silly to believe that whoever this being is subscribes to our definition of a day, so honestly I can accept that. If God came to a dude a bazillion years ago and described the making of the Universe, I’d Baby Einstein break it down a bit for him, too. If a day in our time equals four trillion years our time in THEIR time, then sure, I can see playtime with cosmic dust-bits as a perfectly good explanation for our Earth's creation. That’s the “Big Bang,” right? Something like that. POOF! Universe at your service, made in “seven days.” Especially since this Universe of ours is supposedly limitless. Does that make sense to ANYONE? Seriously. I've laid outdoors and looked at the sky and thought about the stars that I'm really looking into the past to see and have thought to myself, I'm looking into a limitless thingamajig. But what is limitless? Never-ending. And yet...the Universe is supposed to be expanding? Expanding into limitlessness. I'm no physics master and I've just re-taken Algebra II for the four hundredth time (hyperbole) but from my understanding, limitlessness...is never-ending. Like the Story. And the Song. It goes on for forever. However, unlike the Never-ending Story and Song that Never Ends I cannot Google its origins. (Well, maybe Wikipedia has something. Gotta love that site. Or not. It’s your preference.) I suppose that's where the entire debate of time/space comes in. If physical matter can be interpreted into both physical mass as well as linear-ish time interpretations and the crossovers between the two, then perhaps there is a physical boundary to the Universe. But it doesn't matter (Hah! Matter.) considering that it goes on for forever with time and---here's where it will have gotten cold out and I will go back indoors. My head would be swimming and I will spend the remainder of my evening thinking about non-Universal things. Like Cheez Wiz. Fascinating product, no? And you know when you’ve reached the end of that can. 

Back on the farm, this all-knowing-all-seeing-all-awesome being had a messenger who They sent to Earth who eventually in the prime of His life willingly let us royally fuck Him over so He could save all of our asses from going to hell. Pardon my language. (I was good with the capitalization though of the "He"s and "Him"s though, right?) The whole sacrificial thing, although incredibly sucky for him, is pretty good deal for the rest of us. I don’t know why He had to die, though. That still doesn’t make sense. Not even in (Spoiler alert!) Matrix: Revolutions. Now, this is of course in the Bible’s New Testament. The Old Testament’s a pretty cool compilation, too, some argue even better, though admittedly I’ve never gotten past reading the whole beginning bit where Joe had five horses and 16 sons and 14 daughters and lived for 2,500 years...like I said, math wears me out. One day I’ll make it all the way to the apocalypse, though, how fascinating is that? Reading about the end of the world. Talk about ultimately fruitless effort expended!

So I pray to this Guy sometimes, when I remember, if someone’s sick, and haven’t fallen asleep first.  Of course, admittedly, when I’m in a tight spot. “Dear Lord, if you make this computer run faster, I promise I won’t be such a disappointment to the world.” Jesus! High-speed connection. I always find the clasping of the hands thing a strange way to dial-in to God. In a strange way, it does make me feel a bit more focused, but perhaps that’s with practice. 

I won’t say I’ve ever been a particularly religious person. I’m spiritual, though. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, and heck, I find it works just fine. When I’m alone in a room I know I’m not alone. And I don’t mean that in a Big Brother kind of way. Just...I know I’m not alone in the universe. When I’m alone I’m not lonely. Really, the only time I feel lonely is when I’ve alienated myself FROM myself in one of those woe-is-me, please-somebody-open-up-a-hole-in-the-floor kinds of ways. You know, it makes me think about what God thinks about suicide. In a weird way it makes me smile. Maybe the reason God’s supposed to get pissed when you kill yourself is that to Them, we’re all little sandcastles. Hear me out. If you made a bazillion sandcastles and did a great job on most of them and maybe had a plan for each of them, wouldn’t you be pissed if a whole bunch of them went and knocked themselves down without your permission? Like murderers. A big, mean, nasty sandcastle that just knocks all the other ones down. I won’t bother with rapist sandcastle and adulterous sandcastle and plagiarism sandcastle analogies; I think you get the point. “Sandcastles” could also be replaced with “small action figures” but I seriously can’t see God caring about an Iron Man figurine and sand is in keeping with all those religious analogies already out there. 

Anyway....I’m not really going anywhere with this. Some people think none of us are going anywhere at all, anyway. I think that’s sad, though.

Thing is, when I’m doing the praying thing, I feel like I’m talking to something. Then again, when a telephone call drops out and I find that I’ve been talking at nobody for who knows how long, I thought that I was talking to someone then, too. Though, in that situation I was talking to someone sure-fire for at least a certain amount of time. Maybe that’s what faith is...picking up a phone and hoping someone’s on the other end. Kind of like a party line phone. I know, gag me with the analogies. But really, the Bible’s full of them. Analogies and parables. That’s really all Jesus talked in. It’s as if he set his Facebook filter to “Parable.” Wow, an analogy about parables. Well, oh well.  
 

My laptop’s getting hot. Maybe it’s outside looking at the stars while I’m typing.

Also, I believe in the sciences. I believe what we know can’t be disproven as of yet. Again with the whole year-thing...no, I know the Earth isn’t 50,000 years old. I don’t believe dinosaurs are a giant hoax. Excuse the pun, that’s just a retarded way of thinking. “Retard” I’m using in the musical sense of course, as in ‘slow.’ Decrescendo! Crescendo! Repeat!

Wanna know a secret? Sometimes I start my prayers with a variation of, “Hi God, it’s me. No, it’s not Margaret. It’s Erin, again.” Sometimes late at night I find myself funny and moreover I think God, if They’re out there, must get really, really sick of the same old theme song. “Our Father who art in Heaven...” I know Their name is hallowed and all that, but I’d like a change-up once in a while, I’d appreciate it. God’s got to have a sense of humor, if They’re out there. I love that Ellen DeGeneres joke where she talks about God being a middle-aged black woman. LOVE it. Just shows how silly everyone is by even pretending to be able to understand anything, at all. Oh, the world is flat, is it? Oh, outspoken women must be witches, huh? Oh, it’s okay to kill of an entire race of people to take over and inhabit their country? Take that, Americans! No, really, I love it here. It’s just that Native Americans didn’t know they were signing up for that job when they fed us dinner, did they? No good deed goes unpunished...I’ll tell ya.
 

By the way, English native speaking people of the world: They’re, there, their. Here, hear. You’re, your. Know, no. Choose, chose. It’s, its.

They’re generally uncaring and therefore their usage of English here is just as bad as you hear. Really, you’re silly if your knowledge the English language stops just after Sesame Street. Nobody, however, can be forced to choose a different path in life than one which they’ve already chosen. It’s just the way it is, and each person is allowed to choose their way in life, in the same way that a lion chooses its mate.

LIONS. RAHR.

Clearly, I’m no scholar. I’m not even that great of a student. At one point in my life I displayed amazing potential and that’s probably down the tubes. We’ll see, I suppose. Anyway, the point is, there isn’t a point. There is never going to be an answer. And as much as I love to talk about the Apocalypse, it even says in the Bible wherever that we’ll never see it coming. Haven’t people been predicting the end-of-times for FOREVER? Who knows, though. Maybe the New Testament will be the first sequel released which is better than the original. Though I hear a lot of people liked The DaVinci Code better than Angels and Demons.

However, there is significance in our insignificance as a race. As a planet. If we’re such an anomaly in the Universe, why are we destroying our planet? It kind of makes me laugh. And on the subject of aliens, sure, I don’t see why there wouldn’t be them. Other things living on one of the bazillions of planets or moons out there in the bazillions of galaxies out there in the limitless Universe. I think it would be kind of funny if Earth was God’s test run and then They went and made a better planet, somewhere else. Without taxes and lots more taco nights. Maybe there, the color blue is red and the color red is yellow. Makes ya wonder what the color yellow is, doesn’t it? Take that, primary colors! Then again, maybe there’s no opportunity in that other world for light refraction. Maybe it’s a huge underwater planet (without Kevin Costner) where creatures not all unlike our deep-sea-dwelling friends reside. HA! That also kills me. That we’ve blasted off to the moon so many times and have sent rovers to Mars (Never mind the scrapping of the NASA programs in light of recent economy crap) but we don’t even know all the animals we have here on Earth! Let’s send people down to the depths of the Ocean! Let’s find Jimmy Hoffa’s body! Let’s feed the starving people in the world and find a way to keep AIDS from spreading! Let’s find out while all of this is happening why can’t I get good service on my cell at work!

Really, I’ve written too much. And that’s fine. For me, I mean. If you’re still reading this, kudos to you, I haven’t the faintest idea why you would be. But thanks.

There are other religions out there. Judaism, for example. Which is quite similar to Christianity, really, just minus the past 2,009 years. And Islam. And Buddhism. And Satanism. And Wicca. Among the million other religions we can’t forget the Pagans who so kindly leant us the tree for our use at Christmastime. Thanks!

And then there are all of the different denominations in the Christian religion. Frankly, this gets me miffed. I think we should really all have a somewhat common, basic interpretation of that book. I was Christened Episcopalian. This means I can get divorced if I decide to get married and my future husband is an ass in one way or another. Also, this means that by being Christened, I don’t have to get baptized. Sweet!

Honestly, it’s a mystery. All this stuff is a mystery. Supposedly, God came to a bunch of guys and had them write a book which we call the Bible. Sort of...Holy Ghost-writers. And I guess why God didn’t write it Himself was that it was cooler to have us all doing it. Or maybe God’s left-handed and we would have pshawed him because a long time ago being left handed was all voodooevilohno! And most of the stories in the Bible, well, I think they’re probably just that: stories. Just because Dr. Seuss wrote fictional stories didn’t mean that they didn’t make an impact. With our little pea-brains, who knows why we only use 10 percent of them, we can only understand so much. We can only look upon the mortal form of Zeus.

Praying’s kind of funny, too. We never know what’s best for us, do we? We don't know what’s good for us but we know what we want. Remember Bruce Almighty, where he answers all of the prayer-mails he got in his inbox? Yeah, that didn’t work out so well. Except for that woman who went on the Krispy Kreme diet. That was awesome.

I don’t know the answers; I can’t even pretend to think about knowing what’s happened to the Universe or what’s going to occur, but I’m just fine being a Christian. Happy, even. It doesn’t hurt me to be one, I don’t think. It feels right to me, most times. Though sometimes I think about the Bible and just scoff at its seeming impossibilities (doubting Thomas!) when I remember that it’s written in parables for our baby brains and with stories for our little minds to process and I remember. I remember that there’s good in the world. I remember that there’s also bad. And I think about how funny it’d be if we all died and it turns out we were ALL wrong about EVERYTHING. Just like M. Night. Shyamalan would have written it. A la Sixth Sense, not The Happening. Bring on the pearly gates. Just not to soon, please. Unless it’s “my time...” whatever that means. Maybe it's God needing help making sandcastles or something. Doubtful, but plausible. Get on it, Mythbusters. That’s right; I know you’re running out of material.

So I haven’t read the Bible and the only verse I can think of is a made-up one from a pro-wrestler, but I get what the book is for. I don’t read manuals a lot of the time, anyway. Sometimes I like to figure it out while I go along. And if I’m wrong? If God doesn’t exist and blah blah blah? Then oh well. We’ll know after we die and you can laugh at me when we’re dead and our souls go nowhere and life utterly ends. Oh wait, you can’t. Because you’ll be dead. Then again, if we can chat in line while we’re at the pearly gates, that sounds good. I’m up for that. I'd like to think that I get to see all the cool people who've left this world again, in the next life. Whatever and wherever that is. IF it is.

So...hi God, it’s me. Erin. Margaret’s out again, but I’ll stick around for a while, if you’ll listen.

I’m doing something else when I am called into a room by apparently my Grandmother who has gotten a new digi-spy chip and reads all of my AIM and internet history—is all ashamed of me for some reason and I think Chris is there and for some reason he is, too. I’m totally feeling screwed and it’s BLAH.

At a pool, watching some sort of lesson or speech by the lifeguard in the pool, and the little boy next to me in the water keeps farting. He’s wearing some sort of red, mesh bathing suit, too, so it’s all bubbly. I’m the only one who notices and I ignore it because really, so what? But then I hear a really weird sound and see brown clouds coming out from him, and then pieces of brown and I realize very quickly he has pooed up the pool. He just sits there for a moment, staring forward, pretending it didn’t happen. I’m like...hey, no, that’s not cool. So I get the kid’s attention and am like “Hey, gotta do something” so he lets his Mom know, who quickly lets the life guard or whoever’s speaking know, and the pool is quickly evacuated in no time. And there it is: the pile of poo-ness in the pool. The lifeguard picks up a piece and throws it back in. I’m not sure why.

Then, I’m with Beyonce and her two friends driving along in their car looking for 123 E. North St., HAHA, just to be like hey, look at that, you’re 123 E. North St. and I live at 123 E. South St., how funny, and to meet the person inside. Pretty sure this was Ms. Knowles’ idea. When we get there it’s this black guy with no real furniture and no AC and he has fans going everywhere, and of course he’s excited to meet Beyonce. When we get out of his house and I go to pass the car, I reach for my purse in the car from the passenger side because I realize that it’s out where anyone can steal it, when another big black guy opens the driver’s door and asks if he can have something from my purse and I say “No, sorry, can't find anything in this purse” and then I believe he comes around the car and comes after me and then the other guy turns out to be after us, too, and in cahoots with this guy. They grab all four of us and for some reason let me get away. I have nothing on me but the clothes on my back and I have no idea where I am, and I start running and running and don't stop until I reach a while tunnel. It’s then I realize this is the point where I could run away and save myself, or turn back and help someone who’s probably a goner, otherwise. So I stop, and turn around, and go to them. I hear them talking about things and I think calling me stupid or something. Anyway, I jump on the one guy’s back and try to break his neck, channeling my inner Chuck Norris, but that’s really easier said than done and I think I just end up cracking it for him and he captured me again. Wahh wahhh.

It’s now evening and we’re going over the parking lot in a strange sort of soaring, overhead fashion and I realize there are zombies down below...EVERYWHERE. Nasty, zombie-rific zombies. Really? Yes. In the back of my mind I wonder why Beyonce has decided to go roaming the streets for kicks and vaguely come to the conclusion that it’s because there are ZOMBIES everywhere and you have to get your kicks, somehow. So they start coming after us, of course, and these are smart ass zombies, I’ll tell you. It gets to the point where one of them has my head in a lock and is pouring a bottle of yellow liquid soap down my throat, so I breathe through my nose to compensate. Then they catch on and start to pour it down my nose and I try to breathe through my mouth but really, gooey soap is clogging it, I have no way and I know it. There’s no way to breathe through my nose now, either. I assess my options and come to the conclusion that I’m screwed.

At this point I jerk myself awake by swinging my arm forward. There are no zombies there, but there is a headboard in my room that I smash my finger against quite painfully. However, it could have been worse. Hurrah, wicker furniture!

Anywho, there ya go. XD

So I made the journey to Chevy Chase on Sunday and got to the destination restaurant to meet with my family--in one piece! (Ba-dah!) There, I was able to wish my Dad and Granddad a Happy Father's Day. The food was okay, but waaay overpriced. Had decent smoked salmon and mini-bagel for first course (didn’t realize it would come...raw), then ho-hum chicken for second course and poached pair with a chocolate sauce and two scoops of vanilla ice cream for dessert. Definitely the highlight of the meal was the pear. That’s right; a whole sentence was just devoted to dessert.

We all went back to my Granddad's house afterwards and made idle chatter for a while, and basked in those terribly awkward silences between the small talk. Can't do anything about them, those silences. Just have to endure them and wait for someone to say something. It's a strange little black hole you slip into when those silences occur, isn't it? Perhaps something funny was said. The group laughs, a few side comments are made, a few more chuckles are eeked out and then it begins to slow, and fade. Like the dying applause at the end of a rinky-dink talent show act. And then it happens: the group enters a seemingly never-ending expanse of silence. Time slows...stretches on for eternity. You can look down at your feet and smile a bit, either genuinely due to bemusement or a bit forcibly, pretending you are still musing over the previously said joke or story. Then, perhaps, someone clears their throat. That's a subconscious cue that someone else should say something. If the throat clearing is ignored, someone else nods their head and “Mm”s, as if in agreement. Agreement of what, the dying conversation? In rare cases, another comment about the last topic will slip from someone’s lips, but will go largely ignored. Then someone else may let out a light sigh: another cue. In sigh language, not to be confused with sign language, this all translates roughly to: For the love of God, will someone PLEASE speak? Finally, someone will. It's usually the most mundane or out there, most ridiculous topic--"I hear Andre Agassi likes corn..."--but everyone in the group will greedily attach themselves to the silence-breaker, clinging onto the comment like lint to your best, black dress slacks. It’s a piece of driftwood in a sea of silence. "Corn? Really? I love corn." "I was raised on corn." "Mm...corn." “How do you eat your corn?” "I'm hungry? Anyone up for some corn?" "I've been craving corn." "That Andre--talk about a rough time he's been having in games, lately!" "Did you hear about the US Open the other day...?" Oh, those silences. Like the changing of records; picking up and dropping the needle.

Then, heaven forbid, there be a silence at the end of a SERIOUS topic. A sad one, even.  Egh. In such a situation, the same basic procedure as just described is followed, but in place of dying chuckles are the what-a-shames and mm-so-sads while everyone bows their heads as an apparent sorrowful gesture, as opposed to comedic appreciation. Little tsks and throaty sounds of appreciation are thrown in there quite often. At that point, the conversation can either take a sudden upswing for the better –“Have I mentioned how great [insert popular movie title here] was?” – OR someone can decide to go deeper...darker, delving further into the rocky, cavernous world of depressing stories. After much of that, there’s really only room for someone to mention how depressing the conversation has gotten, allowing for a splash of much needed comic relief, and the topic to then be switched to something, anything, more lighthearted. As humans, at a base level we’re not very good at being depressed all of the time. We’re meant to experience highs and lows. It’s a good thing. It’s healthy.
 
After lunch I went to my Dad's and stayed there. I’ve been there for the past couple of days. Just got back home earlier this evening. Monday, something weird went wrong with the water pump and earlier today learned it was a wiring problem. I was woefully un-bathed for half of the day and then took a mini-bath in a neighbor’s boiled hose water when I couldn’t take it anymore. O shower, where art thou? Then it got fixed the next day, so yays for that. Talked with my Dad a bit, which was nice. Played Trivial Pursuit, and was one piece away when my Dad won. I’m simply atrocious at historical questions. Darn you, yellow! I wasn’t anywhere close to winning when it came to that pie piece lol.

It's been nice being back home, if even for just a bit. Missed my Mom.

Anywho, I’m going to catch the AMTRAK and Metro tomorrow morning/afternoon and make my way to my Granddad’s. Then, after I stay the night there, I’m going to hop on a bus with my Aunt and we’ll make our way to Enn Why See. Once there, gloriousness shall ensue. I’ll get home on the 29^th, I hope, and then Amy’s coming down from then until the 30^th. Then, I suppose things’ll get back to normal. Hurrah! Anywho, I’ve got to get to sleep. Le train in ze morning.

By the way, hi Chris! I love you.